
All About Women & Girls Film Festival Winner: Love, Mommy
12/29/2018 | 25m 39sVideo has Closed Captions
All About Women & Girls Student Category Winner
Two years after being released from prison, Kilzy Gonzalez is fighting to regain custody of one of her daughters. Tala Hadavi and Yeong-Ung Yang bring us an intimate portrait of a mother trying to overcome personal demons and prove she deserves a second chance.
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Funding for TO THE CONTRARY is provided by the E. Rhodes and Leona B. Carpenter Foundation, the Park Foundation and the Charles A. Frueauff Foundation.

All About Women & Girls Film Festival Winner: Love, Mommy
12/29/2018 | 25m 39sVideo has Closed Captions
Two years after being released from prison, Kilzy Gonzalez is fighting to regain custody of one of her daughters. Tala Hadavi and Yeong-Ung Yang bring us an intimate portrait of a mother trying to overcome personal demons and prove she deserves a second chance.
Problems playing video? | Closed Captioning Feedback
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Providing Support for PBS.org
Learn Moreabout PBS online sponsorship>> BONNIE: HELLO, I'M BONNIE ERBE.
WELCOME TO TO THE CONTRARY YEARLY FILM FESTIVAL CALLED, ALL ABOUT WOMEN AND GIRLS.
AS A PLATFORM FOR FIRST TIME FILM MAKEERS.
WE HIGHLIGHT THE BEST WORK IN FOUR CATEGORIES.
THEY ARE: CURRENT EVENTS ABOUT ADVANCING THE RIGHTS OF GIRLS, WOMEN OR DIVERSE COMMUNITIES IN THE U.S. CHANGING CULTURAL ATTITUDES ON GENDER FROM A WOMAN'S PERSPECTIVE.
U.S. WOMEN'S HISTORY AND STUDENT ENTRY.
THIS WEEK'S WINNER IS IN THE STUDENT CATEGORY.
LOVE, MOMMY.
BY FILMMAKERS, TALA HADAVI AND YEONG-UNG YANG.
IS THE STORY OF A FORMERLY IMPRISONED WOMAN WHO WAS ATTEMPTING TO PUT HER TROUBLED PAST ASIDE AND REUNITE WITH ONE OF HER DAUGHTERS.
>> KILZY: I WAS BORN AND RAISED IN THE BRONX.
AND I AM 36 YEARS OLD.
AND I HAVE THREE GIRLS.
BRUSH YOUR TONGUE.
BRUSH YOUR TEETH.
RIGHT HERE.
REMEMBER?
SALINA IS MY YOUNGEST AND SHE'S THE ONLY ONE THAT I RAISED FROM BIRTH.
YOU HAVE BOO-BOO THERE?
WHO GAVE YOU BOO-BOO?
>> YOU GOING TO HAVE A GOOD DAY IN SCHOOL?
LIVE WITH SALINA AND OUR CHILDREN AND IT IS A FACILITY FOR WOMEN WHO COME HOME FROM PRISON AND TRY TO REUNITE WITH THEIR KIDS.
ALL RIGHT.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
WHO'S THIS?
KALENA.
WHO'S THIS?
WHO'S THIS?
KALENA.
>> HELL HELL.
>> HALENA.
>> I'M IN A CUSTODY BATTLE FOR HALENA.
MY MIDDLE YIELD THAT I HAVE TO GIVE UP PRIOR TO ME TO GOING TO PRISON.
SHE'S WITH ROXANNE.
MY BROTHER'S MOTHER-IN-LAW.
SHE'S A VERY CLOSE FRIEND.
MY OLDEST, HALENA, IS LIVING WITH HER FATHER FOR THE MOMENT BECAUSE SHE GOES TO SCHOOL.
THIS IS WHERE I GREW UP AT.
THIS IS WHERE I'M FROM.
CYPRESS AVENUE.
>> HI EVERYBODY.
HI EVERYBODY.
YOU OKAY?
HERE, HERE, I DON'T HAVE NO MONEY RIGHT NOW ON ME.
HERE YOU CAN HAVE THAT.
ALL RIGHT.
SEE YOU LATER.
SHE JUST ASKED ME FOR MONEY.
AND I'M SURE IT IS FOR HER HABIT.
I NEVER JUDGE BECAUSE I'VE BEEN THERE.
AND I KNOW.
I KNOW.
I'VE BEEN THERE.
I WAS ROCK-BOTTOM.
I WOULD WALK WITH A SHOPPING CART.
I WAS BAD.
REALLY, REALLY BAD ON DRUGS.
MY LIFE WASN'T EASY BUT I'M ALIVE, I'M OVER DRUGS.
I HAVE BEEN CLEAN NINE YEARS.
I GOT PREGNANT FROM HALENA MY MIDDLE CHILD.
MY BILLS WAS PILING UP.
THERE WAS THIS GIRL AT MY JOB AND SHE WAS HEROIN SICK.
I GOT HER HEROIN AND SHE GAVE ME A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY.
I SAID I'M GOING TO DO THIS FOR 3 MONTHS AND THAT IS HOW I'M GOING TO PAY MY BILLS AND THEN I GOT CAUGHT.
AND I HAD TO DO TIME.
NOW I'M FREAKING OUT.
I'M STARTING TO CRY WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY DAUGHTER.
I THINK I ASKED MY BROTHER.
I ASKED MY FRIENDS.
THE PEOPLE I DID ASK, THEY SAID NO THEY COULDN'T.
SO I WAS LIKE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, LET ME ASK ROXANNE.
>> ROXANNE WAS THE BEST CANDIDATE FOR THE SITUATION BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW HER AND WE KNEW THAT ROXANNE ALWAYS ENJOYED KIDS BECAUSE SHE ALWAYS HAD MY DAUGHTER OR -- YOU KNOW, HER OTHER GRANDDAUGHTER.
SO IT WAS JUST A SMOOTH TRANSITION.
WE KNEW IT WOULD BE SOMETHING SMART FOR THE SAKE OF THE BABY.
>> ONLY TIME I COME HOME FROM JAIL, LET ME DO MY TIME AND WHEN I GET BACK HOME LET ME GET MY BABY.
OF COURSE, HELL, YES, I'LL GIVE YOU BACK YOUR BABY GIRL AS SOON AS YOU COME HOME I'LL LET YOU HAVE HER.
I SAID LOOK, LET'S WRITE THIS IN A LETTER.
MY MISTAKE WAS I DIDN'T PUT UNTIL I CAME HOME FROM PRISON.
AND I WASN'T SPECIFIC WITH THE DATES AND WE HAVE A FULL JOINT CUSTODY BUT SHE HAS FULL PHYSICAL CUSTODY SO THAT'S WHY WE ARE WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW IN THE COURTS.
THANK YOU.
THERE SHE GO RIGHT THERE.
HEY, MOMMY, I'M COMING RIGHT NOW.
I'M LEAVING THE SUPER MARKET RIGHT NOW.
I'M NOT GOING TO LEAVE YOU OUT THERE BUT I CAN'T STAY WITH YOU.
I'M COMING.
I'M COMING.
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
BYE.
LOVE YOU, TOO.
IS THAT HER?
THAT'S NOT HER.
OH, THAT IS HER.
HEY, MA!
>> THERE IS MY DAUGHTER.
>>THE YEAH.
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
THAT'S MY DAUGHTER.
THAT IS SALINA.
>> NO.
SHE IS PRETTY ONE.
YOU'RE GORGEOUS.
YES.
>> SAY HI GRANDMA.
>> I LOVE YOU KILZY SO MUCH.
I'M SICK BUT I'M ALL RIGHT.
I GO TO THE DOCTORS AND EVERYTHING.
I WANT TO LEAVE MY HOUSE.
I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE NO MORE BY MYSELF.
I'M ALWAYS ALONE.
I'M NOT EATING.
>> IT'S COLD.
YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE OUT HERE.
WHY ARE YOU OUT HERE?
YOU JUST CAME FROM THE HOSPITAL.
I GOT TO GO.
I GOT TO GO BUT I'LL COME BACK.
>> OKAY.
OKAY.
>> ACTUALLY BREAKS MY [BLEEP] HEART.
>> SHE NEEDS A LOT OF HELP.
>> SHE DOES AND I CAN'T RIGHT NOW.
I'M TRYING TO HELP ME AND MY KIDS, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
>> I'M GETTING HALENA'S INSULIN -- I WAS NOT ABLE TO CELEBRATE IT WITH HER, EASTER WITH HER.
ROXANNE, SHE WOULDN'T ANSWER ME BUT NOW SHE ANSWERS ME SO I GET MY BABY THIS WEEKEND.
I BOUGHT HER CLOTHES.
I HAVE A LITTLE TEDDY EASTER BUNNY FOR HALENA.
I GIVE TO IT HER TOMORROW.
I CAN'T WAIT TO STOP LIVING OUT OF BAGS.
BUT I KEEP HALENA'S THINGS HERE SO THAT WAY WHEN I GO ON MY VISITS WITH HER, SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO GIVE ME ANYTHING BECAUSE I HAVE EVERYTHING FOR HER ALREADY.
I HAVEN'T SEEN HER SINCE MARCH THE 22ND.
THAT WAS THE LAST TIME I GOT TO SPEAK TO HER, THE LAST TIME I GOT TO SEE HER OR ANYTHING.
HI, SPEAKING OF -- HI.
GIVE ME KISS.
>> WHAT TIME ARE YOU GOING TO COME?
>> PROBABLY ABOUT 3:00, 4:00.
>> YOU DON'T TO HAVE COME THAT EARLY IF YOU DON'T WANT.
IT IS UP TO YOU.
>> OKAY.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER -- >> JUST CALL ME BEFORE YOU -- >> OH, YEAH.
YEAH.
OF.
>> I'M GOING TO GO TO THE STORE.
>> WHO DO YOU WANT TO SEE FIRST?
>> SISSY.
>> YOU WANT TO SAUCISSEY?
-- YOU WANT TO SAUCISSEY?
GIVE HER SAY KISS.
I GOT YOU A DRESS BUT IT IS KIND OF COLD OUTSIDE.
LOOK WHAT I GOT YOU.
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
OPEN YOUR EYES.
MOMMY GOT YOU THAT FOR EASTER.
>> THANK YOU, MOMMY.
>> YOU'RE WELCOME, MY LOVE.
I DON'T LIKE TO GO TO SCHOOL.
>> YOU DON'T LIKE GO TO SCHOOL?
>> NO.
>> THAT'S NOT GOOD.
YOU HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL AND YOU CAN BE SOMEBODY IN LIFE AND THEN WHEN I GET OLD YOU CAN TAKE CARE OF ME.
>> HI!
>> HELLO, GIRL.
>> HI.
>> YOU WANT TO LEAVE?
YOU WANT TO GO?
>> I'M HER FATHER AND SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME AS YOU CAN SEE.
KILZY DIDN'T TELL ME TOO MUCH INFORMATION THAT WAS GOING ON IN LIFE.
WE HAVE BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER OFF AND ON.
WHEN SHE GAVE BIRTH TO HER I WAS NOT AROUND.
>> DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT TO EAT?
>> I WANT TO EAT -- >> WHAT DO YOU WANT TO EAT?
WHO AM I?
>> MOMMY.
>> WHO IS THAT?
>> DADDY.
>> WE'LL SEE YOU AGAIN SOON.
OKAY.
>> OKAY.
>> I TRULY DON'T BELIEVE THAT ROXANNE IS MALICIOUS BUT I WOULD SAY THAT SHE USED THE LAY OF THE COURT SYSTEM TO HER ADVANTAGE LIKE I LOVE THIS LITTLE GIRL AND I TRY TO HOLD ON UNTIL THE VERY END.
IT IS HARD WHEN YOU HAD AN AGREEMENT AND THAT DIDN'T GO THE WAY THAT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO.
YOU KNOW, IT IS LIKE WHY?
SHE'S NOT YOURS BUT I THOUGHT THAT THEY WOULD HAVE AT LEAST GAVE HER BACK AND LIKE THEN GOD-PARENTS AND THEY CAN SEE HER NIP GIVEN TIME INSTEAD OF MAKING HER THEIR CHILD.
>> THANK YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID.
THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME OUT IN MY TIME OF NEED.
BUT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GIVE ME BACK MY DAUGHTER.
THIS WAS AN AGREEMENT AN ARRANGEMENT.
CAN I HAVE MY CHILD, PLEASE?
>> OH ME, TOO.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT I'M HERE.
>> HOW ARE YOU DOING HERE?
A LOT OF DELVES AND DEMONS?
HOW DO YOU FEEL?
>> NERVOUS THAT I'M GOING TO -- NERVOUS.
IF I WAS GOING TO GET THE URGE.
>> FOR ME AND HER WENT TO JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL TOGETHER.
WE CAME REALLY CLOSE AND REALLY COOL.
THAT IS WHEN WE HAD A CONVERSATION ABOUT SOME OF THE DEMONS THAT SHE WAS BATTLING.
AND WE MONITORED THE HABIT.
WE TOOK CONTROL OVER THE HABIT U AND WE CONQUERED THAT [BLEEP] >> HOW MANY YEARS HAS IT BEEN?
>> ABOUT 10.
NINE AND A HALF.
>> THAT IS HOW LONG I HAVE BEEN CLEAN.
>> YOU LOOK SO HAPPY.
>> I'M OKAY.
I'M STILL FIGHTING THIS CUSTODY BATTLE.
>> I'M HERE TO TELL YOU TO BE SAFE.
YOU HAVE TO COOPERATE.
YOU HAVE TO COOPERATE.
AND ON DAYS WHEN YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE LOOKING YOUR BEST, YOU HAVE TO REPRESENT AND PRESENT YOUR BEST BECAUSE YOU ALREADY LABELED AND YOU'RE ALREADY BEING JUDGED.
PART OF LIFE IS EXPERIENCES.
SOME EXPERIENCES ARE GOING TO BE GOOD.
SOME EXPERIENCES ARE GOING TO BE BAD.
MAYBE YOUR EXPERIENCES IS WHAT MAKE HER A BETTER MOM.
MAYBE SHE ALREADY KNOWS WHAT IT IS TO LOSE IT ALL TO NOT BE ABLE TO RISK IT AGAIN.
YOU CANNOT LET SOCIETY LABEL ME BECAUSE OF A BAD CHOICE.
PEOPLE MAKE BAD CHOICES ALL THE TIME.
IT IS NOT -- IS HOW YOU GET BACK UP.
>> IT IS DIFFERENT HERE.
I GREW UP HERE AS A LITTLE GIRL AND LANGUAGING OUT I USED TO GO TO SCHOOL.
THAT LITTLE WINDOW THERE WAS MY ROOM.
AND THE ONE NEXT TO IT, I WONDER IF I CRIED LOUD ENOUGH THAT SOMEONE COULD HAVE HEARD ME RIGHT HERE.
MY GRANDMOTHER'S BROTHER WHICH WOULD BE MY GREAT UNCLE RAPED ME.
I WENT TO FOSTER HOME.
I DON'T KNOW HOW I GOT AWAY BUT I GOT AWAY.
I WAS 12.
AND I SMOKED CRACK AND RAN THE STREETS ALL CRAZY.
STEALING.
STICKING UP PEOPLE.
ROBBING PEOPLE.
[SIGH] MONEY.
SEX.
DRUGS.
I'VE EXCHANGED SEX FOR MONEY.
I THINK THAT IS WHERE THE ANGER TOWARDS MY MOTHER COMES IN.
BECAUSE SHE NEVER SET AND WONDERED, WHERE DID YOU GET THIS MONEY FROM?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
>> I AM THE FIRST TO SAY MY MOTHER MADE VERY BAD CHOICES.
I ALWAYS TOLD MY MOTHER THAT SHE'S A GREAT INDIVIDUAL BUT SHE WAS A BAD LEADER AND FROM A YOUNG AGE I'VE ALWAYS EXPRESSED TO MY SISTERS AND BROTHERS LIKE, HA, WE HAVE TO GET OUT OF SCHOOL.
WE HAVE TO GET A JOB.
WE'VE GOT TO BE EDUCATED.
DRUGS IS NOT SOMETHING THAT WE SHOULD BE EMBRACING BECAUSE NOT ONLY IS MY MOTHER SOMEONE THAT USED DRUGS, THE FAMILY, THE CYCLE IS THERE.
WE SEE IT.
>> THERE IS NO CARD IN HERE SO I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
SO HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO PAY THE RENT?
WHAT -- >> SO YOU DO IT FOR ME.
>> YOU TOOK MY NAME OFF OF THAT PART OF YOUR LIFE.
>> OF WHAT?
>> OF HAVING ACCESS TO YOUR MONEY.
>> NOBODY HAS ACCESS TO MY MONEY.
>> I REMEMBER AT THE AGE OF 15 MY MOTHER SAT ALL OF US KIDS DOWN AND SAID, I'M HIV-POSITIVE.
>> EAT YOUR THINGS THE BUTTER ROLL.
>> SHE EXPLAINED HER HUSBAND GAVE IT TO HER.
WHETHER IT WAS EXCHANGING NEEDLES BECAUSE I KNOW HE HAD AN ADDICTION AS WELL OR SEXUALLY.
I DON'T KNOW.
SHE'S GETTING WORSE NOW.
NOW SHE'S AT HER LAST -- >> THAT IS HALENA.
THAT IS MY MIDDLE DAUGHTER.
I'VE SEEN HER CHANGE.
>> I ALWAYS FELT LIKE YOU ALWAYS PUSHED ME ASIDE.
AND I'VE DONE SO MUCH IN THE STREETS.
>> I'M SORRY.
>> AND YOU WOULD BE IN THE HOUSE.
>> DO YOU KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> WHERE I AM AT NOW.
DO YOU EVER SIT DOWN AND THINK ABOUT I WONDER WHAT SHE'S DOING?
>> YES I USED TO THINK THAT.
ONCE I FOUND OUT YOU WERE USING I USED TO THINK A LOT OF STUFF.
>> I CHOSE WHEN I BECOME A MOTHER, TOO, TO DO EVERYTHING THAT I WANTED YOU TO DO FOR ME.
NOW YOU WASN'T A BAD-MOUTH.
WE ATE AND WE WERE CLEAN AND MY HAIR WAS ALWAYS DONE, YOU KNOW.
BUT I -- I WANT MY KIDS TO -- I WANT TO BE A ROLE MODEL AND AN EXAMPLE TO MY KIDS.
I NEVER MEANT TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS.
AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN.
THE DAY YOU LEAVE ME.
>> I NEVER MEANT TO HURT YOU.
I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS DOING THAT.
[CRYING] >> I AM ORGANIZING THE ROOM BECAUSE WE HAVE ROOM INSPECTION AND I FEEL I GET A CURFEW OR I'LL GET IN TROUBLE.
IT IS REALLY HARD FOR ME WHEN PEOPLE TELL ME YOU HAVE TO BE HOME AT 9:00 AND YOU HAVE TO ASK FOR PERMISSION TO GET A WEEKEND PASS.
>> WHY DO YOU GOT THAT FACE?
>> I HAVE NEVER BEEN DISCIPLINED.
MY FAMILY WOULD TELL ME THINGS BUT I WAS LIKE WHATEVER I'LL DO WHAT I WANT AND COME AND GOAD AS I PLEASE.
I SHUT DOWN AND BECOME THIS EVIL LIKE AGGRESSIVE PERSON AND THEN I JUST LASH OUT AND TAKE IT OUT ON THEM.
I'M ON ANGER MEDICATION.
I'M ON BIPOLAR MEDICATION.
I'M ON DEPRESSION MEDICATION BECAUSE I GO UP AND DOWN.
>> KILZY LET'S TALK ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF NOT WINNING.
>> WHEW.
WHY?
I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT.
>> BECAUSE IT IS A POSSIBILITY.
>> I DON'T KNOW.
WHERE MY MIND AND MY THOUGHTS GO WHEN I THINK OF HER POSSIBLY WINNING.
THAT'S NOT GOOD BECAUSE I'M NOT GIVING UP MY DAUGHTER.
>> AND ON THE OTHER SIDE YOU'RE DOING THE THINGS THAT NEED TO BE DONE.
>> AND I THINK THAT WOULD KILL ME EVEN MORE.
LIKE I'M DOING EVERYTHING THAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO.
A PART OF MY FEELS LIKE SHE IS GOING TO WIN BECAUSE SHE'S HAD HER FOR THREE YEARS OF HER LIFE.
>> YEAH.
>> SO THIS IS WHEN I START DOUBTING MYSELF.
I'M NERVOUS.
>> YEAH.
>> I WANT THIS OVER.
AOKAY, ROXANNE, IT IS KILZY.
CALLING TO SPEAK TO MY DAUGHTER AGAIN.
I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK TO MY DAUGHTER, ROXANNE.
CAN YOU PLEASE CALL ME?
JOINT CUSTODY.
NOT EVEN FULL CUSTODY.
TEMPORARILY JOINT CUSTODY.
GIVE MY DAUGHTER A KISS AND TELL HER THAT HER MOMMY LOVES HER.
THERE WAS A GREAT CONCERN THAT IF SOMEONE WERE TO ASK A QUESTION ABOUT WELL WHAT IS THE DYNAMIC LIKE BETWEEN HER AND HER DAUGHTER OR HOW IS SHE ABLE TO MANAGE HER BEHAVIORS THAT WE WOULD HAVE TO SAY HONESTLY THAT SOMETIMES SHE DOES WELL IN THESE WAYS BUT AT THE SAME TIME, THERE'S SOME YELLING AND SOME THINGS THAT WE DIDN'T THINK WAS AS SAFE OR WERE SAFE OR WERE APPROPRIATE.
>> THINGS I PRAY AND ASK YOU FOR GUIDANCE ON THIS DAY.
I ASK YOU TO BE THE JUDGE.
I'VE COME TOO FAR TO JUST GIVE UP AND LET THIS LADY TAKE OVER.
I'M HERE BECAUSE I WANT MY CHILD FATHER GOD.
I'VE GOT TO CALM DOWN.
I PRAY THAT YOU GUIDE ME, GIVE ME THE STRENGTH, THE POWER AND IN THE NAME OF JESUS I PRAY.
AMEN.
I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND A WORD THEY WERE SAYING.
JUST GIVING NUMBERS AND SOMETHING AND THEN CASE DISMISSED.
I'M LIKE AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
I TURNED OVER TO MY ATTORNEY AND SAID THAT.
SHE SAID OH WE CAN APPEAL IT.
I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION TO DON'T BACK FROM SOUTH CAROLINA SO THAT WAY I CAN BUILD THAT RELATIONSHIP THAT I HAVE WITH MY DAUGHTER RIGHT NOW.
BUT IN THE COURT'S EYES AND THE SYSTEM OF THE LAW, I WASN'T DOING THE RIGHT THING.
I LOOKED UNSTABLE.
>> CAN YOU SEND SOMEBODY TO OPEN IT FOR ME PLEASE?
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
>> I FEEL COLD RIGHT NOW.
I FEEL VERY COLD.
BECAUSE I KNOW THAT SOME WAY SOMEHOW I MESSED UP.
>> YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW MAN.
>> I THINK FOR KILZY NOT BEING ABLE TO GAIN CUSTODY OF THAT CHILD LED TO A LOSS OF HOPE ABOVE ALL THINGS.
WHAT IT WAS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT.
WHO CARES ABOUT CHORES AFTER THAT.
WHO CARES ABOUT CURFEW.
ULTIMATELY AT THE END OF HER TIME HERE REALLY OCCURRED BECAUSE SHE WOUND UP STAYING OUT.
SHE JUST DIDN'T COME BACK.
>> LET'S GO.
COME ON I'LL TELL YOU WHEN TO STOP.
>> WHERE ARE WE AND WHAT IS GOING ON?
>> WE ARE IN THE BRONX.
IN MY APARTMENT.
>> SHE HAD EVERY CAPABILITY TO BE WHATEVER SHE WANTS TO BE.
BUT THERE ARE SOME PERSONAL DEMONS.
AND SHE SUFFERS FROM THEM AND SOMETIMES SHE LOSES THE BATTLE.
>> I JUST GO.
I'M SO USED TO GOING AND BEING AND GOING AND JUST GOING.
I DON'T THINK.
I JUST GO.
I GUESS I'M DOING WHATEVER WAS DONE TO ME.
I'M JUST REPEATING THE CYCLE.
THAT'S ME AND I'M MY MOTHER.
I LOOK LIKE THAT.
SO THAT IS BEING UNFIT.
THAT'S PROBABLY WHY I DIDN'T GET MY DAUGHTER.
>> BONNIE: WE HOPE YOU FOUND THIS EDITION OF ALL ABOUT WOMEN AND GIRL'S FILM FESTIVAL ENLIGHTENING.
PLEASE FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER AND VISIT OUR WEBSITE: PBS.ORG/TOTHECONTRARY.
Support for PBS provided by:
Funding for TO THE CONTRARY is provided by the E. Rhodes and Leona B. Carpenter Foundation, the Park Foundation and the Charles A. Frueauff Foundation.